It's not Chinese New Years. I don't smell any microwave popcorn in the breakroom. And no one's snapping their gum. So what in the world is that loud, popping noise here at work? A BB gun? 2 BB guns?
Oh, it's just Mom. And Fed Ex has just been here with a package.
So now you know. Mom, for all her small and dainty looks, turns into some sort of frenzied wild woman when put face to face with bubblewrap. And she's unfortunately discovered a big sheet of the stuff whilst unpacking a big box of vaccines at the office. I do realize that bubblewrap has some sort of strange universal allure which lends itself to us reaching over and squeezing out a few satisfying snaps, but this woman will not let go until she pops every single blasted bubble on the entire sheet.
Even the big sheets like the one in the vaccine box today.
The other nurses find my look of disgust funny.
Mom's cool-headed response to my annoyance is:
"Well, YOU crack your knuckles."
She's right you know, although in defense, my knuckle antics don't last anywhere near as long as the time it takes to totally demolish a sheet of bubblewrap. Wait, hold on...
Yep, just as I thought. Only a few seconds.
I'm not saying I don't have any strange habits/idiosyncrasies of my own. I do. But mine don't make noise. Take for example my issues with:
TOILET PAPER RE-ORIENTATION.
I am very fussy (bordering on OCD) when it comes to toilet paper placement on the dispenser. There is, in my mind, nothing quite as disturbing as seeing toilet paper on the roll going the wrong way. In the unwritten law of SeanCentral Janitorial Ethics, TP should be placed with the free end coming up over the top of the roll (like in hotels) so the roll spins toward you, like this:
I am somehow definitely disturbed by seeing the roll going the other way, like this (shudder):
Why does it bother me? I have no idea. It just does. And if this little peek into my mind isn't sad enough, I'll also admit to having taken rolls out of a dispenser and reinserting them to my liking, (even if my visit to the bathroom at that particular moment required no use of said toilet paper roll.)
I suppose this weirdness also forces me to warn you that one day when you least expect it, you may find your own toilet paper roll mysteriously switched around from Dangling-In-Back to Up-And-Over-In-Front. So there. If you ever find your own personal roll mysteriously switched at your house, it was probably me. That being said, I just know that some of you clowns will load up your TP going the other way on purpose, and then invite me over and tell me to go into the bathroom and see what's new. You see, this is why I started cracking my knuckles in the first place.
On the positive side of things at work, the saintpaulia leaves that I've been trying to propagate under my grow-light next to my desk, are finally sprouting little plantlets. Looky:
It's pretty ironic if you look closely, at what i am using to line the bottom of the plant tray to ensure proper drainage. Yes. Bubble wrap.
And no, I am not writing this post on company time.
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